You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
