it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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