im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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