We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
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