last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
if i died would you start the facebook group?
going to the gym drunk. fuck whoever made basketball season and getting a spring break ready body in the same season.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
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