If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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