the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
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