so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Randomize
