Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
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