It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
