he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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