How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
