I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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