butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
I wore sunglasses to take a shower. I might be hungover.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
