like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
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