Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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