Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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