I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Randomize