Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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