so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
