dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
