Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
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