How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize