im about as happy as oj after his trial
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Randomize
