I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I think pants incapable of making pants work
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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