My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
Nothing shouts "I'm single" like a thousand needlepoint pillows.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Randomize
