So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
Randomize