then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
time to smoke my breakfast
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
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OMG HAIR ON HIS DICK. HAIR ON HIS DICK AS IN GROWING OUT OF HIS DICK. HAIR.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
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I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
We need to get me chipped asap
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
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