omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
God gave him joint rollers for hands
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
