she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
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