we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Randomize
