before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
Randomize