I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I want to fling myself into the sun
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
