it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
