i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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