one might say we're banned from that church
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
