I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Randomize
