Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
