after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Randomize
