Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
