well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize