I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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