North Korea, Best Korea!
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
