This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
I have a lot of money, and no morals. shots on you when you get here.
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