You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Randomize
