i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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