We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
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