so explain again why im purple
no
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize
