It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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