Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
