I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
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